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Strong Keeps Getting Stronger…

April 30, 2013 by 8 Comments

BOE 2012 Girl

Happy 100,000, Strong is the New Skinny!!!!

Strong is the New Skinny on Facebook just passed 100,000 followers!

Holy. Crap.

Strong is STILL the New Skinny…

Just last week I was talking to a close female friend. She’s beautiful and strong and muscular and quite a badass CrossFitter. And she was lamenting that she wasn’t “mainstream pretty” enough. Apparently, she’d even had a good cry over it the night before.

My advice? I told her to “be a Purple Cow” and sent her my “Is Strong the New Skinny?” blog post from 2010.

Here’s what I wanted her to see:

“…I say, to use Seth Godin’s term, be The Purple Cow. Now, I know women and the term “cow” shouldn’t really be used together, so before I get pummeled I’ll explain. A “Purple Cow” is something remarkable. In a world with more and more advertising “noise” and where there’s someone already filling virtually every need and every niche, a Purple Cow is something that stands out. A brown cow is boring, but a Purple Cow is REMARKABLE.

“If you’re a muscular woman, go after mainstream exposure. Let’s take muscular women out of the bodybuilding subculture and put them in the mainstream…”

- From my post: “Is Strong the New Skinny?“

A few minutes later she texted back: “YES! A Purple Cow!”

The message in that post still rings true. Probably now more than ever…

Stumbling Into Meaning and My Life’s Path…

Summer of 2010 I had no idea. No idea about anything, really.

My life had been falling apart for the few years before – arguably for the 10 years before – and I wasn’t sure what I was going to do next.

But, I was passionate about strength training, CrossFit and Paleo eating and living. And I was also passionate about writing.

Besides that, I’ve always felt that strong was the way to be – for women AND men…

I started blogging that summer with the crazy notion that I was going to make a living at it and write a Paleo Diet book besides. Everyone I knew thought I was out of my mind and needed to be “more realistic” and think about getting a “real job.”

Even crazier than thinking I would make a living at blogging was thinking that somehow my writing and work would “make a difference.”

I started this blog and spent that summer writing and Facebooking like crazy.

And, everyone thought I was nuts for spending so much time on Facebook. “Facebook is stupid!” “I don’t care what someone is having for lunch!” “It’s a waste of time!”

And CrossFit…

I had sold my CrossFit Affiliate earlier that year. But I was still training and most of my friends were CrossFitters. And, CrossFitters love Facebook…

So, many of my Facebook friends were CrossFitters. The CrossFit community was SMALL back then. A lot smaller than now. We’d basically friend request anyone with a profile picture that included anything CrossFit or Kettlebells.

Somewhere toward the end of the summer, I was inspired by a pic my friend Marsha posted of a shirt she made on Spreadshirt.

“Strong is the New Skinny, huh? That’s sort of cool. I bet there’s a blog post in that somewhere…”

There WAS one in there “somewhere…”

It took a few weeks before it came together in my head though. It came together after a run one morning and “Is Strong the New Skinny?” was written. I posted it and thought nothing more of it – I’d been “blogging for no one” most of that time. No reason to think that post would be different.

But it was…

Stacie Tovar

Going Viral…

Over the next few weeks I saw that post pass by in my Facebook feed here and there. I thought, “Cool – someone shared my post…” Then I started seeing it pass by more and more. And more. And more.

In its first two months on the web, “Is Strong the New Skinny?” was read and shared like crazy. Today, it has almost 25,000 views and over 7,900 shares. Wow.

It went “viral” as they say…

And, “Strong is the New Skinny” the Facebook group was born…

100,000 Middle Fingers at Stereotypes

I gave stereotypes the finger when I wrote “Is Strong the New Skinny?“ That summer I was into giving pretty much EVERYONE and EVERYTHING the finger. If it was status quo and mainstream, I was pissed off at it. That post was angry and ranty – and not even very well written now that I look back on it…

But there was raw passion and emotion in that post and I think that’s why it resonated with so many people.

Strong Keeps Getting Stronger…

I say “Strong Keeps Getting Stronger” because that’s exactly what’s happening here.

In 2009, “The Paleo Diet” had about 20,000 monthly Google searches. In 2010 when I started blogging seriously, it had about 80,000 monthly searches. Today it has over 600,000 monthly searches.

And, CrossFit is on ESPN. ESPN. And all the major fitness magazines – the ones that either dismissed CrossFit as a dangerous fad or just didn’t mention it at all – now have special CrossFit sections and features every issue. All of them.

I mention Paleo and CrossFit because both of those communities supported and were supported by Strong is the New Skinny (or SINS) on Facebook in the early days. I see this all as the rise of intelligence in training, eating and role models and stereotypes.

Adam Farrah and Carrie - Strong is the New Skinny

Me and my awesome friend Carrie Chase at CrossFit Relentless in West Hartford, CT.

The world is changing rapidly and dramatically and thinking about eating, training, health and what a “fit” or “attractive” body is for a male or a female is changing right along with it.

Strong is Everywhere…

Here’s a video from CrossFit HQ called “Beauty in Strength.” It’s from September 2012. Not gonna say Strong is the New Skinny is what inspired it… But I won’t say we didn’t… ;-)

 

This is a great video of Christmas Abbott that’s made it’s way around the web. Nothing skinny about her…

 

And this is a post on TheAthleticBuild.com featuring the 20 best bodies in CrossFit – 10 male and 10 female. Not a skinny body in sight…

http://theathleticbuild.com/the-top-20-fittest-bodies-of-crossfit/

Gabe Subry OHS

Julie Foucher

 

And the guys aren’t left out either. Here are my thoughts from a while back on men and changing male stereotypes: “Body Image, Food Addiction and I’m Not Good Enough.”

The CrossFit and Paleo Connection…

Most of my best CrossFit and Paleo friends were made on SINS. And, my friends from the CrossFit Relentless family of gyms here in Connecticut were all around in the early days. They bought a lot of the first shirts and shared a lot of our early posts.

Through SINS I’ve heard from a lot of women who changed the direction of their lives with CrossFit, Paleo eating and the embracing of a strong and athletic ideal over a “skinny” one. Some of these women confided that they’d struggled with bulimia or another eating disorder.

Combine the “strong” ideal with CrossFit and Paleo and lives are shaped and changed.

A difference IS being made.

Strong is What You Build…

In the post “Strong is What You Build” I discussed at length the deeper meaning behind strong and building it. To me, strong is something you build over time. It’s about work and achievement and building character.

Strong is about self-definition. Deciding who you want to be and doing it and being it.

And strong women are becoming more and more mainstream…

I walked by Victoria’s Secret at the mall the other day. Here’s what was in the window. A workout top on a model with muscle. Mainstream. That’s an actual deltoid muscle!

Strong, muscular women are becoming more and more mainstream every day…

Now, I know she’s not going to deadlift 405lbs or rock a sub-4 minute Fran, but she’s got muscle and she’s showing it off. This wasn’t happening even a few years ago! It’s a Victoria’s Secret model!

A Victorias Secret Model with Muscle

YUP! That’s an actual shoulder muscle on a Victoria’s Secret Model…

And, on this same trip to the mall there was an Athleta store going in – right across from VS. That’s the first one in Connecticut. An entire store devoted to workout clothes for women. You can bet that a big company like Athleta has done their homework and knows it’s a growing niche. Corporations don’t gamble on stuff like that and they don’t build a new store in a new state if a market isn’t expected to grow dramatically. Especially in this economy.

In “Is Strong the New Skinny?” I actually said:

“I wanna see a girl with some muscles in the Victoria’s Secret catalog in the next few years. What do YOU think? If you agree, pass this blog post around and get busy!”

(BTW, I was actually attacked by a few feminist bloggers over that statement… Sigh…)

Lo and behold, a woman with muscles in the Victoria’s Secret catalog…

SINS Has Been About Learning and Growing…

We’ve all grown and changed in the past few years. I have. Marsha has. The Paleo Community has. CrossFit has. SINS has. You have too.

I’ve seen friendships and relationships come and go. I’ve had my successes – like a book publishing deal, two regular columns in Paleo Magazine and a lot of other great stuff. And I’ve had some pretty significant failures. I have plenty of regrets and things I wish I could do over. I’ve been hurt by people I thought were on my team and I’ve been supported by others who have always been on my team. And new and great people have joined my team and supported me. I’ve seen what’s real and who’s real and who isn’t.

But, “Strong is What You Build” and we’re all building and growing and changing. We’re all learning and we’re learning from each other. That’s the beauty of the community – or the communities that intersected on Facebook to create “Strong is the New Skinny.”

Less than 3 years into its existence, “Strong is the New Skinny” on Facebook has 100,000 followers. 100,000. I still remember when it was 10,000, then 25,000. 50,000 was a huge milestone.

Every single one of you voted with the “Like” button in favor of being strong, strong women, carving your own path and following your passion. It’s huge. HUGE.

Here’s to 150,000 and beyond.

And, A Personal Thank You…

Finally, this is a personal, heartfelt and very emotional thank you – to everyone.

The SINS community changed my life for the better. I’ve “met” and talked with hundreds of you. I’ve even met a few of you face to face. (Torrey!)

Me and Torrey at BOE 2011

All the likes and shares and comments and words of encouragement changed me, my writing, my life and even my self-image. All for the better. I’m grateful for all of you and I wouldn’t have missed even ONE of the conversations, messages or comments. The line between an “online” friend and a “real” one has blurred into nonexistence for me.

You’re 100,000 of my closest friends.

ttys

Adam

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Filed Under: CrossFit, Fitness, Inspiration, Strong is the New Skinny, Women Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

You Can’t Start Earlier Than NOW…

March 17, 2013 by 17 Comments

Adam Farrah doing a Kettlebell Get Up

“Make Haste Slowly”

-Stuart McRobert in “Beyond Brawn”

It’s a funny thing when you look back on the last year or so of your life and say: “What the fuck was I thinking?”

The last year has been a blur of stress and activity. At least half of that stress was the final “clean up” of my old life which included some legal, financial and real-estate nightmares that needed to be put to rest. They’re done, but the process wasn’t easy.

And I’m still pretty tired from all of it.

Last year was a time when I had to make a mess, stress myself to the max and work my ass off. I had to put my positive goals and passions on hold or slow down on them significantly so I could create a safe and clear place – a foundation – to build those positive goals and passions upon now.

I had to let go of a lot of things this past year. Some were things I wanted to let go of – or couldn’t wait to – and some were things I wanted to keep or would have kept if things could have been different.

An Empty Cup…

There’s that old Zen saying about having to “empty your cup” before you can take in new knowledge. In the same way, my life’s cup is pretty empty now. I’ve made room for all the new, positive and wonderful things I wanted and envisioned for years. And here we are – ready to start.

Start. Fuck.

That’s the downside of spending a few years primarily putting out fires and cleaning up messes. No matter how positive REMOVING those things from your life can be, the end result when they’re gone is a blank slate. A blank slate at best. Back to zero.

I worked hard. And now, I get to start working hard. Fuck.

I get to start training seriously and intensely again. I get to start really focusing on eating and living Paleo 100% again. I get to start working toward making this blog one of the best in the World.

I get to start.

All the working and stressing over practical stuff like houses and moving and paperwork didn’t help my training. It helped create a nice, empty space to START hard training in, but it didn’t leave me better trained today than I was two years ago. If anything, I’m in worse shape today as I write this…

Let the Self-Talk Begin…

This is where I start to wonder why I didn’t do things differently. Train more, have a few less NorCal Margaritas, be Paleo 99% instead of 89% or 79%.

Couldn’t I have handled the last two years better? Couldn’t I have moved a little more? Couldn’t I have been a little more graceful and composed under pressure. Couldn’t I have done better?

I could have made better decisions.

If I really let this spin I can get furious. Furious about the time I wasted. Furious that I’m not someplace other than where I am right now. Furious about all the things I did and all the things I didn’t do or could have done differently. Furious about all the sacrifices I made that were either in service of someone else’s needs or just plain bad judgement on my part.

I could be someplace better.

Now Is All There Is…

I’m a huge fan of Eckhart Tolle’s book “The Power of Now.” That book changed my life back in 2010 and was actually the catalyst for this whole journey – the blog, the book, the move back to Old Saybrook, the daily meditation and yoga. It inspired me to follow my passions and live to be happy NOW. Not at some imaginary end-point in a future now. Now.

“The Power of Now” convinced me to live in the present and experience happy feelings there. It taught me to do what I love now – as opposed to suffering in the present to create a happy future that might never materialize.

That’s always an imaginary future.

All we ever truly have is now. We take action now, we’re happy now or we’re miserable now. Anything can only happen now.

Again today, the message of “The Power of Now” rings true for me: Stop resisting what is.

This is where I am and, for better or worse, the decisions I made brought me here. I could have made better decisions, but I made my decisions with the best information and judgement I had available at the time.

I did the best I could – as poor as that might have been at times.

But, now is all there is. Nothing I can do will change one single thing about the past. The only way possible is forward.

My life at this moment is all there is. I can relive the past in my head as often as I want. I can fantasize about an imaginary or ideal future all I want. I can wish and demand things be different.

They are not different and they won’t be different. Ever.

Some days at CrossFit Ironworks I have the slowest time on the board. Sometimes a few of the supermoms are training with more weight than I am.

And, yes, this is massively frustrating to me.

But this is where my life is at this moment. No amount of resisting what is or anger with myself or mental masturbation will change any of it. In fact, doing anything other than accepting where I am at this moment – the good, the bad and the ugly – will only delay getting to the better place I want to get to.

Start Where You Are…

Everything worth doing takes time. I never truly realized this before – as silly as that sounds.

You can’t become fit in a week. You can’t loose 50lbs in a month. You can’t get healthy and reverse a lifetime of inactivity and bad food in a summer. You can’t build a social circle in an evening. You can’t build a successful blog in a day. You can’t write a book in a week.

You just can’t.

It’s not even that most anything is that hard to do. What’s hard is making the decisions every single day to do the easy things that lead you to your ultimate goals – over time.

No matter how much time you’ve wasted in your life the only thing you can do is decide – right now – not to waste any more.

“I’ll be back baby, I just gotta beat this clock
Fuck this clock, I’ma make ‘em eat this watch
Don’t believe me watch, I’ma win this race
And I’ma come back and rub my shit in your face, Bitch.
I found my niche, you gonna hear my voice
‘Til you sick of it, you ain’t gonna have a choice…”

-Eminem

Just Start…

If nothing else, this time of working to get “back to zero” has made me a much better coach. I can now deeply understand what it feels like to not be where you want to be in some areas of your life and not be able to get there in an instant.

True success is built slowly, one little bit at a time. The little successes and good decisions add up over time. I’ve seen it in my own life and I’ve seen it in those I’ve coached.

The only starting point you have is now, though.

Decide where you want to go and then get moving.

Just start. Don’t wait. Start. No matter how small a start. Start.

Get to work.

ttys

Adam

P.S – I wrote a post a few years ago that complements this one pretty well. Here it is: Is it Time for An Intervention?

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Taking This Paleo Life Seriously…

February 11, 2013 by 15 Comments

man alone in cave

Sooner or later, I think the quest for good health removes us from mainstream society. Not all at once, but slowly.

Each individual needs to decide how far he or she wants to take this, of course, but my path seems to be moving me more and more toward the “fringe.”

I’ve said in the past that my goal was to be a “Fringe Wacko.” Apparently, that’s becoming more and more of a reality.

“One can be instructed in society, one is inspired in solitude.”

-Goethe

In my Paleo Lifestyle column for this most recent issue of Paleo Magazine (Feb/March 2013), I said:

“It takes time to build a life that’s different from the one you used to live and different from most of the people around you. Living in a way that’s contrary to the culture at large – and counter to a lifetime of conditioning – isn’t always easy.”

This is even more true for me now than it was when I wrote it a few months ago. Virtually nothing in my life is following any kind of “normal” path. But, isn’t that a good thing?

I mean, if you live like everyone else, you’ll have a life like everyone else. Beyond that, every single human being here on Earth has a different experience of life. What works for one person – or even many – won’t necessarily work for others.

Even within the Paleo community, there’s a wide variety of personality types, diets, training habits, depth of implementation, etc.

Social Conditioning…

All of us are socially conditioned. It’s a fact of living in a modern marketing and media-dominated society. Some of us are more socially conditioned than others – and some of us in more negative ways – but there’s no denying that we’re all plugged into The Matrix to one degree or another.

I’ve struggled with this more than most I think – I was home schooled since second grade.

Because I missed out on a lot of social conditioning to begin with, I never really fit in. Difficult as a kid for sure, but now I see that I’m more comfortable than most living in my own reality and challenging social norms.

Where most people have a limit or a “set point” as far as how far outside of “normal” society they’ll go, I’m not really sure I do. If I do, I just haven’t found it yet.

Leaving the “Noise” Behind…

house in snow

Maybe it’s just because I’m snowed in here in my little beach cottage in Connecticut after a blizzard, but I’m finding myself more and more happy alone, in silence and working.

“In the end, it didn’t matter. That year made me a pro. It gave me, for the first time in my life, an uninterrupted stretch of month after month that was mine alone, that nobody knew about but me, when I was truly productive, truly facing my demons and truly working my shit.”

-Steven Pressfield

I promised myself this would be the year for big training and health progress, big writing progress and a quieter, more stress-free life overall. This past year – 2012 – I wasted a lot of time on things that were important to someone else and not important to me. I can’t ever have that time back. I can’t ever know what I might have created in that time or what positive impact a different use of that time might have had on my health.

I won’t make that mistake again. 2013 is my year to make the progress that matters to me.

The more focused on this I get, the more the noisy, useless, fake people fall away. As the clutter clears from my life, I’m finding that I have more and more time to invest in the positive relationships and projects of my life.

The Hermit…

the hermit tarot card

I’ve always been creative and introverted. It’s quite appropriate that my Tarot Soul Card is “The Hermit.” The card represents, among other things, the seeking of wisdom from within. It’s the archetype of the “Wise Old Man” and the lantern represents illumination, insight or discovery.

Blame it on being home schooled since second grade, but I need solitude to write and create and be who I truly am.

Lots of it.

This isn’t always easy for people who get close to me to understand.

When I’m running around “doing stuff” I stop being a writer. Writers write and they tend to do it alone in a quiet, comfortable space. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never bumped in to Stephen King at Starbucks. I recently read his autobiography and, lo and behold, he has a quiet space in his house in Maine where he writes.

Every. Day.

He didn’t say anything about Starbucks…

Solitude…

“Without great solitude no serious work is possible.”

-Picasso

“The mind is sharper and keener in seclusion and uninterrupted solitude. Originality thrives in seclusion free of outside influences beating upon us to cripple the creative mind. Be alone – that is the secret of invention: be alone, that is when ideas are born.”

-Tesla

I think I’m in pretty good company on the solitude thing…

I can’t have it any other way. I thrive in solitude. I thrive when I have plenty of uninterrupted alone time to think and build and create. I thrive in silence and I thrive alone. I thrive when I run on my own internal rhythm and I completely “loose it” when I’m being run by someone else’s needs and demands and schedule.

I guess what I’m saying – and how this applies to Paleo eating and living – is that it might be good for you to stop giving a shit what other people think about you and your choices and your lifestyle. Unless you want a life just like theirs, you shouldn’t be taking the advice of others or yielding to their peer pressure.

If deep and abiding physical solitude isn’t quite your thing, at least find yourself some mental solitude to make sure the agenda you’re following is your own and not someone else’s.

I guarantee there are places in your life – right now – where you can do more of something, less of something, start something or stop something that will improve your life. Make the decision on your own and do it. Never mind what everyone else is doing…

ttys

Adam

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It’s Up To You – Are You Ready?

February 9, 2013 by 8 Comments

Kristin Doing a PR Over Head Squat

“…If you had one shot, or one opportunity, to seize everything you ever wanted, one moment, would you capture it or just let it slip?”

-Eminem

Here’s a question for you: Where are you not giving and living 100% in your life right now?

What are you waiting for? Can’t you do better?

Here’s another: Do you have work to do on yourself or in your world that will make your life a better place in 6 months or a year?

Why aren’t you doing it? Whatever reason you have, valid or not, fix it. Now. Go.

And, finally: What can you commit to and start – today – that will make your world a dramatically different place over the course of this new year?

You know what you need to do. It’s no secret to you. Each of us knows where we can be doing better in our lives.

This stuff isn’t easy, though. This blog is all about fitness and training and Paleo eating and healthy living. These topics are – by necessity – about change and growth and making changes in our lives and our habits. Sometimes the changes are difficult and uncomfortable. Very often we learn a lot about ourselves in the process of making the difficult and uncomfortable decisions.

Paleo Diet Seminar at CrossFit Relentless in West Hartford, CT

“Ready When You Are, Bro…”

I’ve returned to CrossFit. I needed to. I needed community and I needed hard training. I needed to be around like-minded people. I needed motivation and support. I needed the energy and passion that comes with CrossFit and I needed a great place to train.

I’ve been friends with Merle Mckenzie from CrossFit Relentless since 2008 – before CrossFit Relentless itself even existed. The Relentless family of gyms is quite a force here in Connecticut. I can’t think of a place I’d rather be training or a CrossFit family I’d rather be a part of.

Now, Merle has a serious “no bullshit” attitude. Those who know him know what I’m talking about. I reached out to Merle because I needed help. I needed help with my training and I needed someone who would push me to do what I said I was going to do. Trust me, you don’t want Merle busting your balls about your lack of training motivation or not doing what you say you’re going to do. Maybe that’s where the “Relentless” name came from…

Now, I KNOW everything I need to train myself to a high level. I have a training and certification resume a mile long. But I wasn’t doing it. My motivation was virtually nonexistent. I was, basically, depressed. I was in a hole and couldn’t get myself out. I was doing great coaching and inspiring others, but I was earning an “F” in self-motivation.

I told Merle I needed help getting my fitness shit back together. His response?

“ready when you are, bro”

Typical Merle. No bullshit. Nothing fancy. No caps or periods either. :-) That one line cut through it all.

It was about me being ready. I had all the resources and support I needed. It was all waiting for me. The question was, was I ready to take the opportunity to do what I said I wanted to do?

Me Push Ups

No more excuses…

All my BIG excuses and distractions excited my life last year and January of this year. I could have laid on the couch for another 6 months sucking my thumb with my stuffed animals, my cuggie and some Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, but I wasn’t sure I’d be too excited about myself and my life this summer if I did that.

No one would have necessarily blamed me if I was still depressed and exhausted after the stress of the last two years, but I would have blamed myself. No matter what it took, I was going to get myself out of the mud and get moving again.

“ready when you are, bro”

That was it. It was up to me to decide where I was going to take this…

Choose to Focus on the Positive…

Throughout 2011 and 2012 I did too much waiting and too much living in the future. I blamed myself for – and took responsibility for – the behavior of others way too often. What’s even more sad, is I spent a lot of time accepting others for who they were and how they were showing up in the world while some of these same people criticized me for who I was and how I was showing up.

All that’s over now and I’m working to show up in the world with more strength, courage and integrity.

I WILL show up in the world with more strength, courage and integrity.

It’s time to get serious about building the life I want to live and live it. I think you should do the same if you’re not now.

The lesson I learned over the past few months is that I can live my dreams as soon as I’m ready. Everything I need to live and thrive and be healthy, successful and fulfilled is within me  and it’s within the world I’ve created for myself.

I have all I need. It’s within me and it’s within the world and the friendships and relationships I’ve spent the past 5 years creating and nurturing.

It’s not “out there” and it’s not dependent on a specific person or situation being in my life or not being in my life.

My success and happiness is dependent on me. It’s not dependent on what the non-starters of the world choose to think of me or how they choose to act in my life.

Loose the Non-Starters…

I spent the past year putting 80% of my effort into losers, non-starters and dead-end relationships. I was so drained by negativity and bullshit that I was showing up in the GOOD relationships in my life with too little to give.

Worse, I was showing up FOR MYSELF and for MY OWN life with little vigor and too little to give. I gave some of my best away in places where it didn’t matter and wasn’t appreciated.

Live in the Present…

Here’s a hint for you. Live in the present and evaluate your relationships mainly in the present.

Every time I go to one of the Relentless gyms I’m happy to be there, happy I went and I leave having pushed my limits and improved. I feel good in those places and with those people. I’m inspired to improve myself and bring more of myself to the world when I’m there and after I leave.

I’m not “waiting” to feel good “later.” I’m not waiting for it to get better there. It’s good there now.

Don’t wait for things and people to change. Stop making sacrifices. Stop sacrificing your values for others. Stop living your life halfway.

Stop living in the future.

Live now.

If things aren’t flowing in certain parts of your life now, it’s very likely you need to make some changes. They might be difficult and uncomfortable changes, but you probably need to make them.

Sometimes it’s hard to do what’s best for you and what will serve your long-term goals.

But, where will you be in 6 months, a year, two years, five years or a lifetime if you keep doing what you’re doing? Better make a change sooner instead of later…

Make This YOUR Year…

Can you step into your power RIGHT NOW and live the way you want? I bet you can at least start.

I’m going to make this my year. The past two years have been very difficult. A large part of them were spent cleaning up the mess that resulted from my leaving my old life behind so I could live the life I wanted and had envisioned for myself.

I’ve now got a blank canvas to create the life I want on. It took more than two years, but I HAVE that blank canvas now. It’s up to me. Life’s waiting on me now.

“ready when you are, bro”

I’m going to live that life now. I’m going to step into it and live it and make this my year to finally start living. I’m inviting you to do the same with me…

I want to be better. I CAN be better and I WILL be better. I want to bring more of myself to the world. I want the world to be a better place because I’m in it.

I’m ready.

ttys

Adam

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Strong Is What You Build…

October 9, 2012 by 5 Comments

sins shirts at usapl 2010

Strong is the New Skinny is an idea that spread. And spread. And spread.

We couldn’t have planned it. I don’t think it would have spread if we did plan it. The lack of a plan is what made it so great. It was completely organic.

It’s just over two years ago that Strong is the New Skinny started on Facebook. As I write this, “SINS” has 81,647 “Likes” on the Facebook Page.

Marsha and I had no plan when we started. We still don’t have a plan – other than showing up every day, being authentic and caring about our friends.

An Idea Whose Time Had Come

From Wikipedia

“The term ‘Internet Meme’ refers to a concept that spreads rapidly from person to person via the Internet, largely through Internet-based email, blogs, forums, Imageboards, social networking sites, instant messaging and video streaming sites such as YouTube.”

From Latest in Paleo

“Practical Paleolithic – Selected as Blog of the Week 10/11/2010. A little something for everyone here, and popularizer of the ‘Strong is the New Skinny’ meme.”

How about that? This blog “popularized a meme.”

(If you weren’t around in the very beginning, the post and Marsha’s infamous shirt that started it all is here.)

I never really thought it would last. Usually these internet things come and go, right? Strong is the New Skinny came but it didn’t go. I don’t think it’s ever going to go.

Strong is the New Skinny is a sign of the times and the Digital Revolution we’re living in . It’s about old ideals going away, creating our own ideals and living authentically to our own values.

I believe that’s the true reason Strong is the New Skinny spread the way it did and keeps spreading.

As much as it’s thumbing a collective nose at an unachievable stereotype for beauty and women’s ideals – and some really cool T-shirts – its a lot more.

For me personally, Strong is the New Skinny represents the idea that we all have the opportunity to decide for ourselves what we want for our lives and what standards we’ll live by. We all have a voice now and we don’t need permission from anyone to live our passions and define ourselves.

I spent a lot of my life hoping others would invite me to their party. The world has changed now and none of us have to wait to be invited to anything anymore. Each of us has the power to invite ourselves to whatever we have the passion to create.

Skinny is what you’re born with, strong is what you build.

Skinny is easy. You either win the genetic lottery and have a body that society covets or you abuse your body into the cultural ideal with too much cardio, not enough food and maybe some pills on top of it.

Strong is different though. Strong is about hard work. It’s about showing up day after day, year after year and decade after decade. Strong is about showing up setback after setback.

Strong is about taking control of your life, your health and your body and creating positive change.

You can’t buy strong. You can’t starve yourself into strong. You have to put in the work and the effort and train intelligently. You have to show up every day and do the work.

You don’t get strong without putting in the time and doing the work.

Skinny is something you either have or you don’t. Strong is something you can build if you want it bad enough.

Strong is saying no to taking what they give you and no to what they tell you you can and can’t do.

Strong is saying no to doing what you’re told by a pop culture machine that doesn’t care about you.

Strong not taking what you can get and being thankful you got it.

In broader terms, strong is about those of us who have been told no – regardless of talent, skill or willingness to work – now having the opportunity to decide for ourselves what direction our lives will take.

Strong is Strong is the New Skinny – Tens of thousands of people who clicked “Like” when presented with the idea of deciding for themselves what standard they were going to live by.

ttys

Adam

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Time’s Up! Are You a Professional or an Amateur?

July 11, 2012 by 17 Comments

“This isn’t the stage we want to set going into our 40’s…”

Robb Wolf said this to me in early 2010 during a phone consult. These words stuck with me. At the time, I was 38 and Robb was 39 (I think). Back then, I was still living in my too big house with the two mortgages, stressed out of my mind and sick with adrenal fatigue and digestive issues galore. (You can read more about my personal journey to Paleo here…)

In a few weeks, I’ll be 40. I don’t get too hung up on age. Particularly because I plan to live to 120 (Seriously, I do.). But the 40s thing and Robb’s ominous words do have me thinking. I think this is the point where you either go in one direction or the other. As in, you either become that seemingly “ageless” person who doesn’t look, act, think or perform with any regard or respect for their age or society’s ideas of what people that age can do, or you go along with the mainstream media and the medical establishment and everyone else and start down a road of diminished function, misery, prescriptions, falls and broken hips and senility.

Do I feel 40? No… And, yes…

Actually, I feel young and vital and nowhere near 40.

Usually…

Other times, I feel old and exhausted and like I can’t take another second of any of this digital age and all the distraction and stimulation (There’s more on digital distraction and how to deal with it here…).

But, I’m not going to get hung up on my age or anything else. Randy Coture turned 49 this past month and he seems to be in OK shape :-) My Jiu Jitsu teacher’s teacher, Roy Harris, is 50 this year. He moves OK for an old guy :-)

Randy Coture

Randy Coture – UFC Hall of Famer

What’s cool about Roy Harris is that he’s evolved his whole game so that it works for someone who isn’t 22 and a gifted athlete. His strategy and technique is so refined that he can move slow and he doesn’t need a lot of speed or explosive strength. Not that he doesn’t have either, he just doesn’t rely on either because there’s always someone stronger and faster. But smarter and more aware of the infinite, subtle details is a game you can continue to improve with age – that game has no limitations.

Roy has told us that he loves rolling with the young explosive “studs.” Roy’s Jiu Jitsu is so good and so refined that he can just let them explode and push and power and work for as long as they want – which isn’t very long no matter what kind of shape they’re in. While they work, Roy doesn’t do much. Once he feels them get tired and start to breathe heavy, he goes to work nice and calmly at his own pace and does what he wants with them. That’s experience and mastery… Every one of us who’s rolled with Roy at Modern Self-Defense says the same thing – it’s like wrestling with a giant python with mind reading capabilities…

Roy Harris BJJ

Roy Harris – Martial Artist

But, You Still Have to Work…

When you’re in your 20′s and early 30′s, you feel like you still have time. With the arrival of 40, I don’t feel like I have time to fuck around anymore. I have plenty of time to do everything I want to do – the writing I want to do, the books I want to create, the ideas I want to put out into the world, the training I want to do… But I DON’T have time to WASTE. I know what I want and I know where I want to go and I don’t have another year or 3 or 5 or 10 for excuses and halfhearted attempts and schedules so full of “everything” that nothing ever gets done.

Time’s up! It’s either time to put up or shut up and get some Depends and call Wilfred Brimley to set up automatic delivery of your diabetes supplies. And, don’t forget your oatmeal…

Wilfred Brimley Selling Quaker Oatmeal

What’s Not Working…

So, this is all great. I know what I want and I know how to get it and I’m still young enough to actually do it.

So, what’s the problem? What’s not working?

What’s not working is me. I mean, I’m working my ass off, but I’m not getting where I want to go necessarily. I’m doing too many “urgent” things and not enough of the important things that are all too easy to let slide.

In fact, if you read “The War of Art” and “Turning Pro” by Steven Pressfield, you’ll learn that we are naturally prone to let the really important non-urgent things slide. It’s a lot easier to put off writing a blog post or a book or an article and check your email or your Facebook status again for the hundredth time that hour. It’s easier to deal with all the emergencies that blow up in the moment than it is to get to a Jiu Jitsu class or get your next workout in or to write another section in your next book.

Pressfield will tell you that this is where the amateurs are separated from the professionals. Amateurs follow – and embrace – the distractions. Professionals “Do The Work” and “Turn Pro.”

Turning Pro…

Right now, I’m reading “Turning Pro” by Steven Pressfield. It’s a great book that’s brought a ton of value to me already – and I’m not even halfway through it! Steven’s main point is that we need to “turn pro” if we’re going to stop messing around and actually create the things we want to create in our lives and in the world.

So, thanks to Steven’s work I’m “Turning Pro.” I’m going to treat my writing and my training as a professional would…

Turning Pro by Steven Pressfield

 

I Was a Pro Once Before…

Way back in my bodybuilding days I was a “pro.” Not really, but I had the mindset of a pro. The best training of my life and the best shape of my life came after about 6 months of focused training for the very first EAS Transformation Challenge back in 1996. What’s funny is that I didn’t even give a shit about the car! I wanted the exposure and the sponsorship and the privilege to be able to train full time as my job. I actually said if I won I wouldn’t go back to school the next year and would start competing.

Of course, I didn’t win the contest and Muscle Media 2000 and Ol’ Bill Phillips turned out to be a little different than we all had thought and hoped, but that time really taught me some things – and it is STILL teaching me things. Back then, I was treating every workout, every run, every meal and every supplement purchase as a career building event. Every night I was focused on getting a perfect night sleep. My workouts started the night before as I reviewed my training journal and read up on a few things that I thought would be useful for the next day’s workout.

My whole “deal” was training back then. I lived it. I truly believed with everything I had that I could win that contest and get the endorsement contract. I didn’t know it at the time, but THIS is what Steven Pressfield means by “Turning Pro.”

Muscle Media 2000 Cover

Building a Boring, Uneventful Life…

The past few years I’ve been working really hard to have a boring and uneventful life. I’m most happy and productive when I have long stretches of uninterrupted time with nothing to do but work out and write and rest and read a good book about writing or training. I’m most miserable and unproductive when I’m running around putting out fires and “managing” my time and my commitments and trying to do “everything.” You can define “everything” in this context as pretty much anything that doesn’t matter in the long run and has nothing to do with any of the important goals in your life.

If A Blogger Never Blogs, Do You Hear Him?

That’s a play on that Zen riddle about if a tree falls on a bear shitting in the woods and no one is around… Or something like that… But, what do you call a writer who never writes? Or a Paleo blogger who’s so stressed by social media, email and digital stimulation he’s on a 24/7 cortisol ride? What about a supposed athlete who isn’t anywhere near his potential – regardless of age.

It’s time to do the f’ing work!

From Here on Out, I’m Doing The Work…

Enough is enough. I’m going to get to work.

Here are my goals:

Write

I’m a writer. Writers write. I’ll write every day from here on out. Early in the morning. I can currently knock out 1000 words or so before 10am. Blogger Chris Brogan says he does about 4000 words a day. He jokingly states his occupation as “Typist” when he fills in the “Hello My Name Is” card at conferences. I want to be a typist like Chris…

And I’ll write offline. Yeah, offline. I’ll copy and past my finished work to the text editor on my blog. No more writing with an open browser and internet connection.

And, I’ll write more Paleo health books this coming year. I have 5 outlined right now. FIVE. Those outlines need to become finished books. And they will.

Train

My good friend Merle just opened CrossFit Ironworks in Higganum, CT and I’ve committed to training there and joining that community. That begins in earnest tomorrow. I’m also hitting BJJ twice a week and getting a run as weather permits. Yoga and/or meditation will happen daily. I’ll get my next belt in BJJ next summer (2013) when Roy Harris is here for his yearly visit.

And, Not Much Else…

The two major goals above are going to take precedence over EVERYTHING else… That’s it. No more messing around. It happens now.

The Futility of Goals and Timelines…

In the above goals you might notice something that contradicts what virtually everyone tells you about how to do goals. My goals above aren’t highly specific and they don’t have definite timelines or other metrics behind them for the most part.

Here’s Why:

The epiphany I got from Steven Pressfield’s work is that showing up and doing the work is most important. And, that’s also what I’m the worst at. So, rather than making huge goals with aggressive timelines and all this other hoopla, I’m setting goals that are little more than just showing up and doing the work. If I get the days and the hours right, I’ll get the months and years right…

So, this time I’m setting the tiny, daily goals and letting them take me where they will. We can all set every hyper-ambitious long-term goal in the world, but without daily action it won’t mean shit – no matter how many times you positively affirm it to yourself…

How About You?

What goals are you procrastinating on? Where can you be “showing up” and getting the work done where you’re not right now? Leave a comment and let me know where you’re going to start focusing and doing your own work on the stuff that’s important to you…

What do you need to “Turn Pro” at to get what you want and achieve your full potential?

ttys

Adam

Here’s a Bonus…

This is a great video my friend Bob shared with me. The guy’s name is Owen Cook and he’s a “dating coach” from the genre of “Pickup Artists” in the book “The Game” by Neil Strauss. Owen is one of the top coaches in the world and he’s also an extremely intelligent and successful guy. In this video, he digs deep into the topics of success and consistency as it relates to him losing over 70 pounds, running his company, perfecting his craft and, well, getting laid… It’s mostly about the former three though :-) Thanks, Bob…

 

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SINS Angel – Nikki Rinaldi…

February 26, 2012 by Leave a Comment

The SINS Angel post for today is a slightly different spin on the series. It’s still about a strong woman, but with a twist – this strong woman is also professional photographer who has a cool project in the works. Nikki Rinaldi is not only passionate about being strong, she’s passionate about photographing strong women.

I’ve actually “known” Nikki for quite a while since she’s usually at the local CrossFit events taking pictures. I never knew she was a CrossFitter AND that she had a passion for photographing strong women. When I found all that out, I knew I had my next SINS Angel!

Here’s Nikki and what she has to say about her project followed by two of the strong women she’s done work with…

Nikki Rinaldi – Beautifully Strong…

Nikki Rinaldi in a front squat rack position

Nikki’s Vision…

“Crossfit has been a part of my life for about 3 years now. It has shown me to see that any type of transformation is possible. I have had the experience to compete and train with all ages – from college students to retired adults. From all these different people from different walks of life I have seen many get stronger mentally and physically. As I have observed these transformations I have learned that being “strong” comes in many ages, shapes, sizes and looks. It comes in all different levels and even activities.

Strong can be a CrossFitter, a yoga instructor, a powerlifter and beyond. With this said, I have a vision to capture photographs of women in ALL activities and ALL walks of life being strong!

What is your definition of strong and how do you show it? It is a ripped body from training and dieting … it is climbing a wall of rocks or holding that impossible yoga pose? Whatever it may be let’s capture it!

This project started out with two ladies of Crossfit – Janeil Stehr and Jen Bolduc … It started out capturing them at the time they were at the height of their of fitness …. So, I am asking women of all ages, stage and walks of life … BE MY MODEL .. Show me what YOUR strong is and collaborate with me in my effort to show the world what strong really is!

I’m in Connecticut so if you’re a strong woman in the area -  or are willing to travel to work with me – I would LOVE to photograph you!”

Nikki’s Work…

Jen - CrossFit woman with chains

 

Jeneil - CrossFit woman snatch pigtails

 

Jen - CrossFit woman deadlift

 

Jeneil - CrossFit woman deadlift

 

Contacting Nikki…

If you want to get a hold of Nikki, you can visit her website: www.nikkinicolephoto.com

Strong REALLY IS the New Skinny…

When I wrote the original post “Is Strong the New Skinny?” this is EXACTLY what I was talking about. Images of strong women belong in the mainstream consciousness and in mainstream media. I have the feeling work like Nikki’s is going to have a lot to do with that becoming a reality!

That’s it for now!

ttys

Adam

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SINS Angel – Kristin Jekielek…

February 11, 2012 by 6 Comments
Kristin Jekielek Sports Top

February 2012 - What a Paleo diet and CrossFit once or twice a week can accomplish!

I’ve known Kristin for a while now – on Facebook anyway! She’s been doing a lot in the Paleo community and there’s even a pic of her and her sister with Mark Sisson in Mark’s new book.

One thing I wanted to mention – something you guys hear from me all the time and something I hear more and more the more people I talk to – is that Kristin is taking charge of her health by reducing her stress and changing her lifestyle. It’s not just about “Paleo” as a diet or going to “CrossFit,” she’s working on the WHOLE PACKAGE to get where she wants to go and nurture her body…

But, I digress.. Here’s Kristin’s story in her own words along with some Questions and Answers at the end!

Kristin Jekielek…

My Primal journey doesn’t have a dramatic before & after story. I don’t have a fat pants photo. I didn’t recover from a debilitating disease. All that happened on the outside was a few pounds lost with hardly any effort (while eating bacon, cream, and red meat). On the inside, though, I felt BETTER…. I can’t think of another way to put it simply. My thoughts were clearer, I was more energetic, I liked the way I looked, my skin cleared up, my food cravings disappeared, I learned what it meant to be hungry again (and not just tired), and I came to LOVE cooking. Everything just kinda got….better. This all happened in July 2009 when I first learned how to work WITH my body instead of against it by eating a Paleo diet. Six months later I joined a CrossFit box and fell in love with Olympic Weightlifting. The positive changes I saw increased exponentially.

Paleo Just Makes Sense…

The Paleo lifestyle just makes sense. This has become more true for me as I keep learning about our bodies, food, health, and illness. It gives the greatest results for the least amount of effort once you get over the learning curve. Fats and protein work WITH my body to let me know when I’ve eaten enough, and I no longer experience hunger-inducing insulin crashes from gag-inducing low-fat whole grains.

I have become passionate about providing new, useful Paleo tools that help others. For when you’re on the go, I created PaleoGoGo as an iTunes & Android app that provides recommendations on what to eat at chain restaurants. For when you’re at home, I partnered with James Gregory to create FastPaleo, a paleo recipe sharing site where anyone can upload and share a recipe, no blog required. I also give Paleo nutrition seminars at CrossFit gyms across Philadelphia and work on-on-one with clients. I really want to see people succeed with this lifestyle.

A Twist to the Story…

However, my story does come with a twist. I gave myself an iodine deficiency. Your thyroid is dependent on the stuff, so methodically removing all dietary sources of it over the course of a year and a half causes it to misbehave. This is bad because your thyroid impacts all sorts of little things like metabolism and hormone regulation.

So what happened? Since I was eschewing processed foods, eating strictly grass-fed/pastured animals at home, and cooking 90% of my food with sea salt instead of table salt, I was unknowingly omitting all iodine from my diet. The very first day I supplemented with iodine I saw a remarkable recovery. It seemed like an easy fix, and I continue to supplement with iodine daily.

Several months down the road my condition had improved to where I was about 75% better and eating 95% primal because cheating still made my symptoms worse. More blood work identified yet another thyroid problem. I was diagnosed with autoimmune Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, a disorder that causes hypothyroid symptoms while the immune system slowly destroys the thyroid. It’s likely that I’ve had it for years and that it was exacerbated by the iodine deficiency. Hypothyroid symptoms include extreme fatigue, difficulty concentrating, brain fog, acne, change in body composition, depressed mood, sleeping a lot more than normal, zero libido, and more.

 

Kristin Doing a PR Over Head Squat

 

I see it as a blessing that my Hashi’s was brought to light at this point. Otherwise, it would have continued to destroy my thyroid for years and may not have been diagnosed until there was very little left of my thyroid. Right now I have the chance to actively manage my condition and try to preserve my thyroid for as long as I can. It turns out that staying Paleo is a crucial aspect of this, along with stress reduction, stress management, drastically reducing high-intensity workouts, and getting 9 hours of sleep every single day. If you want to read more about my experiences with diagnosing and managing Hashimoto’s, I wrote a blog post about it here: http://fastpaleo.com/what-the-doctors-didnt-tell-me/.

 

Kristin Jekielek at a Tough Mudder event

May 2010 at a Tough Mudder event - YES, that's FIRE in the background

 Learning, Growing and Changing…

I have had to completely change my life to accomplish my goal of managing Hashi’s. It has been unbelievably difficult, but it’s my only choice since I have made health my top priority. I don’t go out nearly as often as I’d like because I need my sleep. When I do, I have to make sure to keep alcohol consumption to a minimum or I’ll be laid out with hypo symptoms the next day. I changed jobs because the stress was causing me to relapse, with a huge decrease in pay. I can’t work out often because my body just can’t handle that added physical stress, so I go to CrossFit about once/week. I’ve learned how to ask for help from others, and more importantly, I’ve learned that I can’t and shouldn’t always try to do everything on my own.

My dedication to overall health has really paid off. While many women with hypothyroidism experience uncontrollable sugar cravings and weight gain, my body has maintained itself at a fairly consistent body composition even though over the past year I’ve lost 10 pounds of muscle because I can’t work out like I used to. I have less definition and a little extra flesh, but it’s not a drastic change. Eating Primal has even helped me to retain a surprising amount of strength during this time. This experience has really driven home the saying that “body composition is 80% diet”.

Is my body where I ideally want it to be? No. Do I think I’m doing really well for the circumstances of the past year of my life? Absolutely. We have to look at the big picture if we want the motivation to truly succeed. Because of this, I will continue to put my health first and make a strict, clean diet my priority.

I’m currently in a transformative phase. I’m beginning to feel like myself again after a year and a half of serious health issues that kept me from being able to think and act normally, but I still have to take it day by day. I can’t set my expectations too high for each day because sometimes the hypothyroid symptoms come back with a vengeance, leaving me weak and unfocused. I have instead learned to be grateful for each good day I have, to get the most out of each day, and to be kind to myself so that I can have more good days. The future holds many possibilities, and I will continue to focus on my health so that I’m in the best place possible each day to take on new challenges.

Some Q and A…

You’ve been really active on Strong is the New Skinny on Facebook for a while now. What does “Strong is the New Skinny” mean to you?

At the heart of the message is empowerment. To me it means taking back the definition of female beauty. Instead of following the cultural norm and spending time, money, and energy on attaining the warped ideal of “skinny”, women are using their bodies to the fullest extent to create bodies that are truly works of art. Instead of hating their bodies for not conforming, women are taking action to make their bodies into powerful forces that uplift their spirits and self-confidence. Women are taking pride in what they can do, and they’re showing us that they can do a whole hell of a lot more than they ever thought possible.  

Where do you see yourself physically, mentally and health-wise in the next few years?

This is a difficult question for me to answer. Living with Hashimoto’s hypothyroidism requires that I release my expectations day to day because sometimes I am physically unable to exercise. However, within a few years I hope to be in a place where I’ve nurtured myself back to my full potential and am off the Synthroid. I want to be CrossFitting 4 times each week, mixed with a nurturing exercise like yoga. I understand recovery time and mobility are essential for continued strength gains. I’ve started to incorporate relaxation tapes and meditation into my daily routine, and I expect to have these formed into a solid habit by then.

My ideal state of being is active and focused while being mindful and calm.

[A note here for Kristin and anyone else who might be interested in guided relaxation/meditation is that I LOVE Hypnotica's Yoga Nidra Mediation as well as his other work. Definitely check his stuff out on CD Baby!]

You’re really active in the Paleo community and CrossFit communities online. Do you have a vision for where you want to see these communities in a few years?

Both communities are set to explode in the next couple years. CrossFit is really gaining popularity through the Reebok sponsorship in addition to word of mouth, and the knowledge of the Paleo diet will spread with it. However, Paleo is also spreading to other demographics based on its own merit. We’re already seeing greater acceptance of Paleo principles in mainstream media. The results are real, and we’ll see more attention being drawn to this.

The Paleo community is absolutely thriving online. There are small groups already doing this across the country, but I’d love to see more in-person meet ups happening. The power of numbers will go a long way towards getting better food options at local stores and restaurants, which will clearly help people day to day.

And… Back to Me…

Thanks SO MUCH for being a SINS Angel and for ALL that you do in the Paleo and CrossFit communities, Kristin! Good luck and I’ll see ya on Facebook!

ttys

Adam

 

 

 

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SINS Angel – Missy Barnum

January 29, 2012 by 5 Comments

Today is a big day for the SINS Angels Series. This is the VERY FIRST ONE! The plan is to feature a female blogger who is living the SINS ideal, blogging regularly and helping to spread the word that Strong is the New Skinny (SINS). It’s all about leading by example!

So, the first SINS Angel is my friend Missy Barnum. Missy is someone I’ve come to know this past year from her posts and participation on Strong is the New Skinny on Facebook. Missy actually STARTED her blog because of her experience on SINS and wanting to join the conversation that’s happening around that topic. Since starting her blog, Missy has had the opportunity to really expand her reach and her writing has been featured in print in Fytness Fanatik Magazine. Missy’s passion for blogging and writing was a major factor in her being featured as a SINS angel – She’s not only living SINS and being the change she wants to see in the world, she’s blogging and writing about it constantly to spread the word and inspire!

So, here’s Missy in her own words. And be sure to check out her blog here: http://mistransformation.wordpress.com/.

The Girl Picked Last In Gym Class…

I am the girl that was picked last in gym class. That is, if I even made it to gym class that day. I used to fake illness on gym class days as often as I could so I could avoid the horror, humiliation and brutality that I used to face when I would be ridiculed about my weight. I identify closely with the childhood obesity problem that faces us today. I weighed over 200 pounds as a teenager and I can tell you first hand that life was anything but fun during those years. Standing up in front of a group of your peers while being chosen for a team and then waiting while everyone else was chosen before you did not do wonders for a teenage girl’s self-esteem.

The summer before my senior year of high school I knew I wanted change. I embarked on a mission to lose weight before I graduated and had to go off into the world on my own. I dropped about 35 or 40 pounds before I graduated high school and continued on that path when I got out of school. When I went off to business school and was on my own, however, my mission turned into obsession and then developed into a full blown eating disorder. The fad diets and fitness preachings of the 90s weren’t always the healthiest and were, for the most part, counterproductive to a person’s fitness goals.

After enjoying a few years as a fit looking young woman, I got comfortable and the pounds started to creep back on even though I was still working out and trying to be mindful of the food I was eating. Then life happened. I had a triple whammy of bad things hit me all at once: My boyfriend at the time was transferred out of state with his job (later I found out he was also cheating on me), my grandfather died suddenly (he had bone cancer) and I was laid off from a job that I loved. I grew depressed and the pounds quickly piled on as I stopped working out regularly and instead I regularly consoled myself with chocolate and other goodies and on the weekends I numbed my pain with a huge bottle of wine. I became obese again.

During this time period, in my early 30s, I had the mindset that I was going to have to live with my “matronly” look for the rest of my life. The men that I dated during that time had the attitude that I should just be thankful that they would spend any amount time with me at all and that they were doing me a favor. They only wanted to see me “at their convenience,” and I bought into that attitude. I allowed them to treat me bad. Then I met someone who I thought was truly interested in me for me. He told me that I was the best decision he ever made. Then a week later, he dropped me like I was yesterday’s news for another girl.

After that blow, I knew I could not live like this for the rest of my life. I wanted change. I wanted to start treating myself with respect and I wanted others to start treating me with respect as well. I asked my mother to buy me a gym membership for Christmas that year. I was pretty timid at first. I just did the cardio machines for a while and then I started to venture into the weight room.

When the pounds started dropping, I used that as motivation to keep going harder. Soon after, I started finding all of these great resources online for workout routines and the use of free weights, barbells, kettlebells, and the cable machine. I found that my passion was with lifting weights. I like to lift. Not just because it makes me strong physically but because it makes me feel empowered and stronger on the inside. I like the way my body looks with muscle. I am still a work in progress but I am proud of how far I have come and where I am at in my journey today.

Some Q and A…

Adam: What would you tell a young woman who’s going through the same feelings and experiences you went through – regarding body image and health – that you were experiencing in High School and College?

Missy: I would tell all young women that they shouldn’t allow outside interference dictate how they feel about themselves which I know is easier said than done. I would say to focus on something outside of themselves. It may be fitness/sports related or it may be a hobby but I think one of the biggest things that is sorely lacking and contributing to the childhood obesity problem of today is a sense of accomplishment. When you feel proud of something you have done, it helps you to expand on to other things. When you don’t feel proud, you become unmotivated and stagnate.

Adam: What has blogging and resources like the SINS community and the Web given you?

Missy: Online resources such as SINS help me to obtain the information and knowledge I need to help reach my fitness goals. Plus there are the benefits of networking. I also belong to a fitness blogging group and we promote each others fitness/health related blogs. This in turn draws more traffic to each others blogs.

Adam: Anything else you want to add?

Missy: My blog has given me benefits that I wouldn’t even have dreamed imaginable four years ago. It is respected by the fitness professionals whose workout DVDs I review and they have posted my reviews on their own Facebook pages and Twitter. I also became a columnist for the online magazine Fytness Fanatik and have written several inspirational and thought provoking articles. The most exciting thing is that I realized my dream this year by having one of my articles go in the special print edition of the Fytness Fanatik magazine. The benefits of inspiring others on their own fitness journey are immeasurable. I have come a long way.

Thanks, Missy!

Great stuff, Missy. Thanks for all the hard work and for kicking off this series! I couldn’t think of anyone better to have done it!

Want to tell YOUR story?

SINS Angels is going to be a regular series on Practical Paleolithic. If you’d like to get featured all you need to be considered is to be living the SINS and ideal and be a regular blogger. Here’s more details on the SINS Angels series and how to get yourself and your blog featured: http://practicalpaleolithic.com/paleolithic-diet-blog/new-series-sins-angels

ttys

Adam

 

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10 Things That Will Make Your Training BETTER…

June 21, 2011 by 53 Comments

Rouge Rack at CrossFit Relentless

A big part of my personal journey recently has been about improving my training. I’ve come at this goal from a bunch of different directions and used many different tools and ideas from a wide range of disciplines and areas to make it happen. Not everything I’ll suggest is typical, but it IS something that’s improved my training on some level and that I think can improve yours too…

1) Set Goals – I talk a lot about setting goals. And I think goal setting is a HUGE step in the process of improving your fitness and improving your life. One of the best programs I’ve ever worked through on goal setting is “Time of Your Life” by Anthony Robbins. It literally changed my life. If you want to see the method I use to keep track of and refine my goals, check out this video blog I did on goals and creating a fitness vision. You don’t need to take it quite to that level – though I think doing so will greatly improve your results AND your life – but the process is something you can use to get yourself on track and get a vision for where you want to go that’s bigger than where you are currently.

2) Add Some Active Recovery Training – This can really be anything from yoga to basic stretching to joint mobility work to committing to using a foam roller regularly. Currently, my active recovery stuff is yoga, meditation and walking around the beaches here in Saybrook Manor (sometimes with a few pounds in my weight vest). The point is, you NEED to “put something back in the tank” when you’re training hard regularly and pushing your limits. I’m always amazed when I see people – particularly CrossFitters – who train themselves nearly to death in their workouts and do virtually NO recovery stretching or “body maintenance” type stuff to help the body recover and improve flexibility, range of motion, etc. If you need some suggestions for this area, check out “Yoga for Dummies” and “Yoga on the Edge” by Sara Ivanhoe and also mobilityWOD.com by Kelly Starett. BTW, things like yoga and mediation have some massive additional benefits that I talk more about in number 10…

3) Learn and Refine a Sport  – For me, this is Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and, to a lesser extent, Mixed Martial Arts. It can really be anything you want and are interested in though. I have a few friends who are into cycling, lots of friends who do martial arts, some who are into Olympic lifting or Powerlifting, etc. The point is, when you choose an area to focus on that has a “constant improvement” or “competitive” aspect to it, all sorts of good things happen. It also helps focus your training because now you’re training for performance in a specific area – it gives you “yardstick” to gauge your progress. If CrossFit or “Sport of Fitness” is your sport, you can still choose a “sub-division” to train, refine and specialize in for a period of time. Find a CrossFit cert that’s interesting to you or nearby and commit to training that particular area for 6 months to a year. For example, you could do a Rowing Cert, Running Cert, Oly Lifting, etc. and then train the techniques you learned. Either way, when you start really training yourself in a focused and specific area, your body and mind respond in a way that’s different from when you’re just “training to get in shape…”

4) Periodize Your Training – This one is HUGE for me. Like most “exercise addicts,” I LOVE to train. I feel weird and depressed when I don’t train and that makes it really hard to take rest days and cycle my training in a way that works LONG TERM. CrossFit is a place where this is particularly important because the usual idea is to “go hard” all the time. My opinion – and guys like Robb Wolf will back me up – is that you need to cycle your intensity by scaling workouts or changing the “perceived intensity of effort” in a regular way. If you look at the Powerlifting world as an example, you’ll see that NO Powerlifters train all out, all the time. In fact, they usually only “peak” their training poundages a few times a YEAR with an absolute maximum effort. Look at the Westside Barbell program by Louie Simmons or Wendler 5/3/1 to get a better understanding of what I’m talking about. Both of these programs cycle intensity and take a very long-term approach to progress. I’ve also talked about this topic at length in my blog posts “Strength Training and CrossFit” and “CrossFit Workouts and Becoming More Efficient.”

5) Clean Up Your Diet – This one is just SO important. By now, everyone probably knows I’m pretty much sold on some interpretation of Paleo. But, seriously, if you haven’t tried REALLY cleaning up your diet for 30 or 60 days – and I mean 100% CLEAN – you’re cheating yourself. I recently recommitted myself to eating 100% clean for a month and you know what happened? I felt so good when the month was over I committed to doing the ENTIRE SUMMER 100% CLEAN. I’m not even going to have a birthday cake for my birthday in July – I’d rather FEEL AWESOME on my birthday and the days after! Clean up your diet and you’ll see that commitment and focus expand into other areas of your life – and you’ll feel great besides. BTW, if you need some REAL WORLD information on diet – Paleo or just healthy eating in general – check out my eBook “The Paleo Dieter’s Missing Link.” It’s over 160 pages of unbiased, hard-hitting, no BS information on eating for health!

CrossFit Relentless Bootcamp Sign

6) Choose a Short-Term Focus Area – I touched on this one a little bit above. Choose an area you’re going to focus on for a 3, 6 or 9 month period and work it HARD and CONSISTENTLY. It could be Pull-Ups, Double Unders, Gymnastic Skills, Running or a certain technique in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu like Arm Bars or Side Mount. This particularly effective when it’s something you currently SUCK at. The point is, if you “drill down” into a specific area or two, you can likely become nearly expert at it in a relatively short time period. It’s just a matter of focusing your efforts. When you focus on a technique or skill or two like this for a time period you’ll actually make much faster progress than if you try to train “everything” for the same period.

7) Choose a Long-Term Focus Area – This one is different from what I was talking about above. You need to also decide on your LONG TERM training focus. This is your MAJOR area of focus and is probably going to be the area you’re most passionate about, the best at and the most committed to improving over a lifetime. Especially when into “everything” like I am and lot of others are, you have to decide what you’re going to become OUTSTANDING at. For example, if you’re a Martial Artist and you’re into Kettlebells and CrossFit, you might decide that Martial Arts are your lifetime focus area where you commit to becoming world class over the course of your lifetime, kettlebells are something you excel at and CrossFit is something you enjoy the benefits of because it improves your other training and makes your Martial Arts better. I talked about this topic in detail in my post “You’re Only as Strong as Your Foundation.” The point is, you simply CAN’T be awesome at everything you do and you need to choose where to focus your limited resources. I think it’s also really important to take Seth Godin’s advice and choose an area that you can actually become THE BEST IN THE WORLD AT. Read his incredible book “The Dip” for more on this and check out this tiny little post by Seth called “Make the World Smaller.”

8 ) Do Technique Work – This goes along with 3, 6 and 7 and has a lot to do with the blog post I mentioned in 4, “CrossFit Workouts and Becoming More Efficient.” It blows me away when I see people training movements like the Powerlifts or Olympic Lifts and they have ZERO understanding of the technique fine points. Do you REALLY think – because your “trainer” or “coach” showed you how to do a movement for 10 quick minutes as part of a warm up before the WOD – you actually “HAVE” that movement and don’t need to practice and refine it? Some athletes spend AN ENTIRE LIFETIME perfecting movements like the Front Squat, Deadlift, Clean and Clean and Jerk. A freakin’ lifetime! There is ALWAYS room for improvement. If you don’t believe me, check out this short little article by Coach Glassman called “Fundamentals, Virtuosity and Mastery.”

9) Create Hard Deadlines – This is a great one to put positive pressure on yourself to really deliver over the short or medium term. This can be anything you want. Enter a local CrossFit competition, commit to a 30 0r 60 day Paleo Challenge at your box, enter a Powerlifting competition or whatever. I just recently did this when Jason Lambert from the UFC was coming to teach a seminar at Modern Self-Defense Center last month. I committed to eating 100% clean and being in the best possible shape I could be in for the seminar – and I organized my training for the 5 weeks leading up to the seminar accordingly. When you have a hard deadline to be in shape and feeling good, you make different decisions and you bring a greater intensity to your training.

Adam Farrah with Jason Lambert from the UFC

Me with Jason Lambert in May of 2011

 

 

10) Learn to Quiet Your Mind – This might be one you weren’t expecting. I’ve been working with the concepts in Eckhart Tolle’s incredible book, “The Power of Now,” for over a year – and they CONSTANTLY take on new meaning for me and lead me to deeper and deeper understandings of myself, my spiritual side and so many other things. If your mind is constantly “chattering away” and you’re not in control – or at least conscious – of  your behavioral patterns, motivations and, particularly, the places where you screw yourself up, you’re going to have a really hard time making progress. Beyond that, I think TRUE HEALTH happens on EVERY level – Physical, Emotional and Spiritual. There’s a lot more to being healthy – things like having a life you love and being able to function in your work, your friendships and intimate relationships. Health isn’t just about having abs and  a good Fran time…

That’s if for now. Below is a little bonus for you if you feel like picking up a new book or two this week.

ttys

Adam

Three Books (That Have Nothing To Do With Training) That Will Improve Your Training…

  1. “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle
  2. Some good fiction like “The Dresden Files” series by Jim Butcher – I first received the advice of reading fiction at night to wind down from Tim Ferris in “The Four Hour Work Week.” I am a HUGE fan of light fiction reading at night to reduce stress and improve sleep!
  3. “Full Catastrophe Living” by Jon Kabat-Zin

 

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